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The war wasn't actually romantic, right?

  8th May 2020 marked the 75th anniversary of VE Day, that wonderful day in history marking when almost 6 years of brutal and bloody war in Europe finally came to an end. The sheer relief felt by the millions who had endured through a level of conflict never before seen would surely be unimaginable to the British public these days. Naturally we use occasions such as this and Remembrance Day every year to remember the huge sacrifices that were made and be grateful for the alliances and peace in Western Europe that exist today.   The strength of character exhibited by those who lived through the war, their determination, courage and resilience are qualities we can all aspire to emulate. I remember as a child being visited by war veterans at primary school: they shared their extraordinary experiences with us, reminding us every time that there is 'no glory in war'. What they had been through was so traumatic, affecting them deeply for the rest of their lives, that they were d...

We need to talk about death

  ‘In this world nothing can be said to be certain, except death and taxes’. So wrote Benjamin Franklin in 1789, ironically only one year before his own passing. The topic of mortality is one that has become especially pertinent topic during the coronavirus pandemic, and it does not generally sit well in a society so determined to avoid the subject. The general feeling is that life is good and death is bad, and must be prevented no matter what. We cannot believe our friends and family will not live forever, because life without them is too jarring a thought for us to contend with. Back in the day we would have seen death and lived with it in a way we no longer feel able to do so. The wonders of modern healthcare are of course an improvement on this, but is it possible we have lost something in the process? Keeping someone alive at all costs is not always the kindest thing to do, in fact in some situations it is nothing short of cruel. Terminal illness, the losses that become more...

A second lockdown seems imminent. And I'm terrified (reply to Cosmopolitan article by Jennifer Savin)

Cosmopolitan article by Jennife Savin   As I sit writing this at my kitchen table on a Sunday afternoon, a blue sky shining above and upbeat 90's dance music blaring through headphones, it would be easy to paint a picture of my life as relatively carefree and easygoing. I'm planning on making chilli con carne for dinner, I have no need to get up early tomorrow and I have nothing more pressing to do than take my dog for a long walk in the countryside. Idyllic perhaps, if you're not a 24 year old degree-educated extroverted young woman who had to cancel her plans to travel to Australia earlier this year and has all but abandoned her hopes of moving back to London to become a journalist (which is me in case you hadn't guessed). I'm currently unemployed, having left my most recent supermarket job in hopes of finding something better, and I live with my family in a small village in one of Britain's many Brexit voting backwaters. I feel as if I am constantly stifling ...

What type of relationship do people use the app Tinder for?

  Why are so many people on Tinder? Sex. Pure and simple. Not that everyone would admit to that of course: according to the Big Tinder Project carried out in 2015 there are no less than thirteen different motives for people being on Tinder, with the most popular being amusement. The rest ranged from curiosity, to an ego boost, socializing and even finding love came in at number four. Casual sex only ranked at number eleven. But if we really explore the desires behind these reasons they all stem from the same basic need: to enjoy attention from someone of your preferred sexual orientation. It may be true that not all flirting leads to intercourse, but no one could deny the kick we get out of interacting with someone we find sexually attractive. Because if it was our conversation we wanted to be stimulating, we would just talk to our friends right? Recent data has revealed that Tinder has 57 million users across the globe, is available in 40 languages and is accessible in 190 count...

A positive take on Ashley Madison

Before 2015 Ashley Madison was not a familiar name in the public consciousness, yet thanks to a hacking scandal which saw the personal details of its members exposed and widely publicised, the site has received its fair share of bad press. Its basic principle is allowing people to discreetly connect and enjoy extramarital relationships, a premise which has sparked debate about whether such a website should even be allowed to exist. It serves as a sordid promotion of infidelity, destroys families, and undermines the love and trust that form the basis of every good relationship. Or does it? Now it has addressed its problems with security and tightened up its safety precautions, should we learn to accept or even welcome such websites as part of dating in the modern world? Ashley Madison has a diverse pool of members, starting from age 18 and going up to 55+. It is accessible to both men and women, and while the registration process does not require its users to divulge a huge amount o...

Lockdown has taught us to live each day to the full and to grab every opportunity (Eastern Daily Press)

  Although lockdown measures are beginning to ease and life is starting to look a bit more normal, most of us would agree that there are still lots of lovely things we’re missing out on – holidays abroad, concerts, sports events, even just a night out on the town. It is important for us to remember that the good times will come around again and in fact they might feel even better than before. For instance, life’s simple pleasures will not be so taken for granted - giving your mum or your best friend a hug will be, at least at first, so much more meaningful than in a pre-coronavirus world. Six months ago, we would never have thought that our physical closeness to each other could be so heavily restricted, and hopefully in the not too distant future it will seem an equally strange idea that our interactions could be so limited. Being able to walk out of your front door and go down the street without thinking about wearing a mask or keeping socially distant – how incredible that will ...

Cancel culture often does more harm than good

'You're cancelled'. It doesn't sound like the right thing to say to a person. We cancel appointments and dinner dates, not people. Yet whenever someone, particularly a celebrity or somebody prominent in the public eye, voices an opinion deemed unacceptable it has become ever so easy to block them out on social media and call into question everything they have ever done or said. It is possible to come back from being cancelled, but the indiscretion will never be forgotten. It is a cloud shadowing the glory of their former achievements. In a world where everything can now be documented and filed away ready to be dragged out into the light at any random point in the future, it simply feels unsafe to voice a controversial opinion.  At this point I feel I should clarify what I mean by cancel culture. There is a difference between a genuine criminal being prosecuted for their misconduct and a public figure on Twitter making a stupid thoughtless comment. Harvey Weinstein canno...